A Love Note to J


Today, it’s been 15 years since the first time I made actual eye contact with you. I still feel this strange, awesome mix of elation and relief each time I look into your eyes, even though now they’re the first thing I see every morning and the last thing I see every night. From the very minute I met you, you showed me you put me first. I hope you know I still try my best to put you first, and I notice that you still put me first too. You do huge things people can’t even believe for me, and those things are obviously amazing, but it’s all those small things you do, the ones you do without even thinking about them…the ones YOU forget you even did…I remember them. I notice them. Every day. Back then, I was quiet and afraid a lot, and pretty insecure and lost about how to get where I wanted to be in life. I’m still quiet and afraid a lot, but I am *exactly* where I want to be, and there’s no doubt that I wouldn’t be here without you. You make me stronger, and braver, and *better* every day. You make me feel like maybe I *could* conquer the world with one hand behind my back. Just please don’t ever let go of the other one. 

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