100 Questions (really only 98 though)

According to the informal guarantee at the top of this list of survey questions, everyone who reads these answers is supposed to know me SUPER well after reading. They are supposed to feel really personally revealing and vulnerable. That’s how they are advertised. But I think that’s bullshit, because except for the first one, I didn’t have any trouble answering them at all. On a blog read largely by people who have never met me in person and most of whom don’t know my real name. In a way, I guess they are revealing. I took the survey to try and jog some writer’s inspiration…for fiction OR an essay piece…anything. Because I’m not having much luck jump-starting any sort of flow right now, and I thought this might help. Maybe it will…who knows? But I’m pretty sure someone reading these won’t know me at my core after reading them. Maybe they won’t know me any better at all. I know I’ve written a lot of other things (blogging and certainly fiction) that were more raw and open and scary to let go that this goofy survey; that’s for sure.

(Images from the film version of John Green’s book, Paper Towns)

Anyway…here we go…100 Questions…

1. What is your middle name? Haha! No.

2. How old are you? 42

3. When is your birthday? October 1

4. What is your zodiac sign? Libra

5. What is your favorite color? Shades of blue and yellow

6. What’s your lucky number? 4 or 44 (maybe that means when I’m 44 it will be a really bad ass awesome year…I hope so)

7. Do you have any pets? I have a pain in the ass puppy right now, Little G. And I used to have the best dog ever and I still miss her even though it’s almost been 2 years.

8. Where are you from? Northern Kentucky

9. How tall are you? Extra Short

10. What shoe size are you? I am truly a US ladies’ size 5, but I wear a 5.5 or a 6 because of the replacement soles I have to put in my stability running shoes to stand and walk without pain. Those don’t fit in a 5.

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? 10? I only wear 2 pair regularly though. The other ones sit in the closet to match clothing for special occasions like weddings and shit.

12. What was your last dream about? I can’t even remember. How ’bout that? I usually remember dreams and have a lot of vivid dreams, but the last one I can recite was probably a week ago or more. It was a nightmare about J not wanting to be married to me anymore. I have a recurring nightmare about that. He assures me it’s not based in any truth.

13. What talents do you have? I don’t suck at writing, I guess…sometimes. I’m a good listener. I’m hyper-observant and have a quick, sharp memory, especially with words. I make an awesome pie. I’m good at picking out patterns, especially in human behavior. Some of these talents coincide and collude with each other to make some folks think I am a little bit psychic (but I’m not; I just have a good memory and good pattern recognition skills and hyper-observancy).

14. Are you psychic in any way? Well…see number 13. I HAVE sort of ‘seen’ situations I was not directly involved with that happened in another place, or ‘predicted’ something was going to happen and then it did, but again…that’s just good educated guessing from memory, pattern recognition, and hyper-observancy. And I do have pretty finely tuned intuition, which is probably a trauma response.

15. Favorite song? Seriously? I hate this question. I can’t even make a top 10 list. I’d be hard pressed to make a top 10 list, even limited to one artist, depending on the artist. I’m a music lover, and I love a whole lot of songs. I don’t enjoy ranking things I love.

16. Favorite movie? Ghostbusters. I still don’t enjoy ranking things I love, but I can state this with pretty much authority. I have many other movies I adore, but that one has been a favorite for 30+ years now, so…yeah.

17. Who would be your ideal partner? Not to sound all Pollyanna and Hopeless Romantic here, but I believe I married him already.

18. Do you want children? I have one kid. I love him to bits. I love him MORE it seems the older he gets. I think he’s turning out pretty cool. But he’s all I want. If you’d have asked me this same question when I was 21, I’d have told you I wanted a lot of kids. But that was mostly because I was full of a lot of love with nowhere to give it safely, and because I had no true idea of the energy and practical finance and structure it takes to be a good parent then, and I had no idea what my own health limitations were.

19. Do you want a church wedding? I had a church wedding. I wouldn’t say I necessarily wanted one though. I wrote some pieces on my church wedding experience here titled Weddings and Sh…Stuff, if you’re interested in reading about that.

20. Are you religious? No. There was a time in my life when I was though. See my posts, Giving Things Up and “WHAT?!”(a post for Good Friday), if you’d like more insight there.

21. Have you ever been to the hospital? Yes. One major surgery with an overnight stay. 4 ER visits. One set of stitches/concussion; 2 broken bones; 1 panic attack where I thought I was dying. Seriously.

22. Have you ever gotten in trouble with the law? No. I’m a goody-two-shoes. I have had a speeding ticket though. One. Speeding ticket.

23. Have you ever met any celebrities? No. I don’t really have much desire to, either. I admire a lot of writers and creators, but I’m not sure I’d actually want to meet them. I clam up talking to old friends a lot of the time, so…

24. Baths or showers? Depends, but usually baths

25. What color socks are you wearing? pink and white

26. Have you ever been famous? Hahahahahahaha! Blogging anonymously is as ‘famous’ as I get, so like…how famous is that when max a couple thousand people might care a little bit about what you have to say? Is that even famous? I don’t think so. But that doesn’t hurt my feelings. Fame is not something I’ve ever wanted or even admired in other people.

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? Hell no. I can barely tolerate dealing with the criticism and contact I currently have with humanity. I don’t even write under my real name.

28. What type of music do you like? I like SOME of everything. I can’t say there’s any form of music that turns me off. I admire musical talent and lyrical talent a lot, and genre doesn’t really matter to me.

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? No, but I’ve been naked in a hot tub before. Does that count?

30. How many pillows do you sleep with? One or two under my head, depending on pillow thickness and my level of sinus congestion and one between my knees. Or sometimes zero if J lets me sleep on his shoulder instead of a pillow.

31. What position do you usually sleep in? On my side, curled up a little, preferably with J holding me.

32. How big is your house? Big enough for us to live comfortably as 3 introverts who like personal space and for our psycho puppy to have a yard to frolic in.

33. What do you typically have for breakfast? I love breakfast, so I change it up a lot. Eggs and toast. Pancakes. French toast. Toast and jam. Cereal. Oatmeal. Donuts. Egg sandwich. Sometimes even really funky stuff like cold/leftover pizza or reheated take-out. I had a peanut butter and jam sandwich this morning.

34. Have you ever fired a gun? No. Doubt I ever will. Definitely have no desire to.

35. Have you ever tried archery? No.

36. Favorite clean word? Laughter.

37. Favorite swear word? Fuck for sure.

38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep? 49 hours.

39. Do you have any scars? Yes

40. Have you ever had a secret admirer? Not one who like sent me gifts or love letters and shit. And I’m glad I’ve never had that, because it would honestly freak me out and I wouldn’t find it romantic. If someone has secretly pined for me without doing that, I have no way of knowing that. Or else they wouldn’t be secret.

41. Are you a good liar? I’d say ‘no’ here, but the truth is, I don’t know. I don’t attempt lying. So I don’t know if I’m good at it or not. That’s like asking me if I’m a good bungee jumper. I mean…maybe? But I’ve never tried it, and I don’t really see the point in trying it at this time in my life.

42. Are you a good judge of character? I’d like to say yes here too, but I tend to focus almost exclusively on the good in people until they actually hurt me or someone I love. I will say that every time I HAVE gotten bad intuition about a person, I’ve never been wrong. I’ve trusted a lot of folks I shouldn’t have though, and I’ve regretted trusting some folks. So…I think I’m good at finding the good potential in people. Which is usually good. But definitely burns me more often than I care for. So I’m not sure if that makes me a good judge of character; more like a good judge of positive potential. When I can’t find the good in people…I’m so far always right about them being harmful or hateful or having sinister motives, however. So I also wouldn’t call myself a POOR judge of character, either.

43. Can you do any other accents other than your own? Eh. I guess in an overdone comedic way. A Scottish one; an Australian one; a deep Southern drawl. But I don’t actually do that very often. I don’t have any reason to.

44. Do you have a strong accent? I don’t think so.

45. What is your favorite accent? Scottish or Irish.

46. What is your personality type? According to the not-scientific and maybe offensive Myers-Briggs survey, I’m an INFJ. Which means I’m an introverted weirdo. I think outside the box a lot, but I more than likely keep that to myself. I am often described as ‘intense,’ ‘mysterious,’ ‘intimidating,’ and ‘hard to get to know.’ I don’t think I’m intimidating, but that’s not up to me to say, and I’ll own the other stuff.

47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing? If shoes count, running shoes. If shoes don’t count, then maybe…I dunno…$50 dress? I’m not really a fashion person.

48. Can you curl your tongue? Yes

49. Are you an innie or an outie? Innie

50. Left or right handed? Right handed

51. Are you scared of spiders? Depends on how big and menacing they look

52. Favorite food? bread with butter on it

53. Favorite foreign food? Ugh. I hate favorite questions. Mexican food; Italian food; Japanese grill; Cuban food; Spanish food; French and Italian desserts; Chinese food…

54. Are you a clean or messy person? Clean, I think.

55. Most used phrased? Either I love you or I’m tired or I’m sorry.

56. Most used word? Probably fuck. I’m not even sorry.

57. How long does it take for you to get ready? From starting a shower to ready to walk out a door for a special occasion? Maybe 45 minutes. Most times to just go out and run an errand? Seconds.

58. Do you have much of an ego? I don’t think so, but that’s not really for me to evaluate.

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? I don’t normally eat them, but I always end up biting when I do.

60. Do you talk to yourself? Constantly. I write character driven fiction and I’m an introvert with an anxiety disorder. I mean…

61. Do you sing to yourself? Yes

62. Are you a good singer? HAHA! No.

63. Biggest Fear? Losing people I love.

64. Are you a gossip? No.

65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen? JAWS

66. Do you like long or short hair? I really don’t have preferences about people’s appearances. I like the kind of hair a person wants to have. Long, short, curly, straight, gray, hot pink…whatever.

67. Can you name all 50 states of America? Not only can I do it, I can do it on demand in alphabetical order.

68. Favorite school subject? English/literature, history, psychology/sociology, biology

69. Extrovert or Introvert? Nearly pathological introvert

70. Have you ever been scuba diving? No

71. What makes you nervous? Other people; medical intervention; violence; raised voices; dishonesty

72. Are you scared of the dark? No

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? It depends on the mistake and on the person making it

74. Are you ticklish? Yes. Super duper embarrassingly ticklish.

75. Have you ever started a rumor? No

76. Have you ever been in a position of authority? I’m a parent. If that counts then yes.

77. Have you ever drank underage? No

78. Have you ever done drugs? No

79. Who was your first real crush? my first celebrity crush was Wil Wheaton in the movie Stand By Me; my first real life human-I-actually-am-in-reasonable-proximity-to crush was RH, an older boy at my high school who played on the basketball team (I have a thing for tall guys).

80. How many piercings do you have? zero

81. Can you roll your Rs? No. It is annoying. Particularly when I was learning Spanish. I can’t whistle either.

82. How fast can you type? 60-90 words per minute

83. How fast can you run? HA! slow

84. What color is your hair? brown

85. What color are your eyes? brown

86. What are you allergic to? Fascism

87. Do you keep a journal? I write a blog. Does that count?

88. What do your parents do? Now they’re retired.

89. Do you like your age? Yeah, most of the time.

90. What makes you angry? Hate. Injustice. Dishonesty. Willful ignorance. Cruelty.

91. Do you like your own name? Not really. My real name is ridiculously common.

92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they? I already have a baby (teenager) and don’t plan to have more. But all the names I liked that I didn’t actually use, I name my fictional characters.

93. Do you want a boy or a girl for a child? I have a son, and I’m glad he’s around. I adore him. I didn’t have a preference when I fantasized about motherhood or when I was pregnant though. And I also think society places too much weight on gender and what it means and conforming to those narrowly defined norms and roles.

94. What are you strengths? Isn’t this the same question as number 13? I hate it when surveys do that. Ask you the same question basically twice.

95. What are your weaknesses? I am often optimistic to the point of foolishness. I’m anxious and nervous. I’m quiet, which isn’t necessarily bad, but it can definitely be a weakness and leads to being misunderstood a lot. I’m really insecure. I’m really slow to trust. I have pretty pronounced Impostor Syndrome. I keep a lot of my emotion and inner life to myself.

96. How did you get your name? I made my pen name by scrambling the letters of my first, middle, maiden, and last names into something that at least sort of sounded like a reasonable real name. I know how I got my actual real name, but I’m not going to tell that story here.

97. Were your ancestors royalty? I sincerely doubt it.

98. Do you have any scars? Ugh. Another repeat.

99. Color of your bedspread? Mostly white, green, and blue with other accent colors in the pattern

100. Color of your room? a light earth tone

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